You may have heard of 'the power of silence'. This is a tool that is used, for example, to elicit a response from an interlocutor, but this is not the case in this case.
We as humans are creatures of habit who work in patterns, the same is true with speech and communication. Communicating… I mean responding, because this is what we often do. When we are talking to people, we are responding. This is mainly due to the fact that our brain immediately creates a response when it hears information, without thinking about it further.
Example:
Name a city.
You probably mentioned your hometown, capital or a city you were last in. However, you know hundreds of other cities. Your brain just gives you a small list, so to speak, and picks the one at the top. Suppose you had waited a while, then you might have chosen something else. For example, that beautiful place where you met your partner or that great holiday when you were 7.
When we relate this back to conversation, we often just say something to fill the silence and because we think that this way we keep a conversation going. But what if we make the choice to communicate honestly and not respond. This is where the power of silence comes in handy. Giving the power of silence to ourselves. When we receive a question or are in conversation and a response is expected, take a 5 to 10 second rest for yourself. Really let the information sink in, don't just say what comes to mind, but fully experience the information you receive and thus create a more real and valuable conversation.
Whether you are a coach, parent, child, partner or grandfather, use it and I would love to hear what you think!
Raoul van Ooij
Enforce Franchisee & Master Trainer
raoul@enforce.nl
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